Dan Savage opened one of his latest podcasts talking about a recent study whose results seem to indicate that straight guys are more depressed and stressed than out gay and bi guys. That’s right. That’s exactly what the study seemed to indicate. Dan’s theory about why that might be true caught my attention.
Here’s the gist of it. Gay and bi guys who are out enjoy expressing their sexuality in whatever way they want to, for the most part. They have a confidence about their sexuality because they’re out to their friends and family so they have nothing to hide.
Straight guys, on the other hand, are constantly concerned about anyone thinking they might be gay. Since society is rife with homophobic idiots, men constantly monitor their behavior. A man who actually expresses feelings or wears pink or enjoys cooking is a potential target for being accused as gay. Dan said he actually gets letters from girlfriends and wives who worry that their guy is gay because he wants to fuck her in the ass! Not to mention the men who enjoy ass play themselves.
So straight men either hide their behavior that could be considered gay or they just don’t do it. And this is not just sexual behavior, this is all their behavior. What they wear, how they talk, how they walk, hobbies, interests and preferences.
Because Dan framed it all the way that he did, I realize now more than ever the struggle you men have with telling your partner you are interested in pegging. Because if you are going to take any behavior and stupidly label it gay, males enjoying ass play is the most powerful gay stereotype there is. It’s certainly different than liking fresh flowers in your home or as Dan says – going to a Broadway show.
Which brings us to Pegging Paradise, a place where pretty much all the men enjoy having their ass played with. (Yay!)
I’d like to think that this is a sanctuary where men who enjoy anal play can come and talk about it, learn about it and ask questions. I have attempted to create a haven for all straight (or not yet out bi) men who love having their ass stimulated, and their partners who enjoy that with them. Guys – here you can stop monitoring your behavior and be accepted exactly the way you are, not judged or labeled. Here, I hope, you can relax just a bit.
If only for a little while, I encourage you to let go of all the stress…of being straight.