In my kink community, a few months ago, we lost a really convenient and cozy venue for our sensual and sexual explorations...and it was sad. It has also left many of us wanting, craving the experiences we enjoyed there, without going down to the larger and more impersonal BDSM dungeons in Los Angeles. I am definitely one of those people.
There is an event that is happening next weekend that I am very much looking forward to. The kink community is actually taking over an entire hotel and turning it into our play space for the weekend. Yes! My hand craves the feel of the crop, the hyper-focus of the experience, watching him twist and turn and moan.
Enter the difficulty in finding a playmate to attend with me. Seriously? Yes.
I asked a young man who may someday actually allow me to test my theory that a measure of emotional healing can happen with pegging. He thinks so, too. His past has scarred him. That's why he seeks the healing. And he thinks that a combination of BDSM impact play and pegging might help to open him back up again. Maybe. A delicate undertaking. He's not quite ready. I will wait until he is. That's not one that will happen on my time frame. Meanwhile, he's a charming dinner companion, far more evolved than most men. Intelligent, introspective, creative and handsome. He feels good in my arms.
So I asked young man who in interested in experiencing pegging and enjoys authoritative women. He approached me online. Normally that would be a - so what? But he's earnest, sweet, tall, cute, funny and fun. There's a softness about him that pulls me in. A sensual touch and he kisses deliciously. Plus he follows directions really well...but I'm not gonna tell you how I discovered that. (Let's just say....I don't like whiskey. But limes and whiskey are pretty damn good.) Alas, he has familial obligations, so cannot join me, much as he'd like to. I understand; we all have lives apart from our kinky sexual explorations.
And of course MGK is out of the picture at this point....damn it. *smile*
So...I was complaining about this situation to Zach:
I'm thinking such lovely nasty thoughts about you right now.....
What a lovely message to come back to. And just what thoughts were they?
Well I just heard from the young man I told you about Monday and he won't be able to make it to the event... (And Mr. "I think you can heal me..." said no about a week ago because he's still a little gun shy.) So I just started fantasizing about what it would be like to be there with you. There were so many scenes that went through my mind....like my story "The Beating" and all kinds of chair things and ass things and toys and....well, yeah. You know....all over each other all weekend and barely able to walk afterwards. That kind of thing. *sigh*
You know I love the the thrill I get thinking of doing something like that...so completely foreign to me...for some reason I love the thought of going somewhere like that where I'd have to cling to your arm for reassurance, or protection or both....just having you protect me. Talk about role reversal..
I know - it would be so very hot to have you there. I'm comfortable in that world and could easily protect all 6'2" of you, ease your way. Help you find the things that thrill you. I love the role reversal.
I am, however, a little dismayed that I am not having luck finding a hot young man to take advantage of for that weekend. Shouldn't be this hard. But I guess I am a little intimidating.
A little intimidating? No excuse. I would be a little intimidated to go with you, but knowing it would hands down be the most awesome night of my life would probably make up for it. If they aren't going with you, it's because they don't have big enough balls to get beat and take it up the ass like a real man.
Well...okay. Though these two men don't fit that description, it still got a LMAO out of me.
The definition of masculinity has changed, gentlemen, hear that? In Ruby Ryder's world, anyway.