May 11 2015

Pegging Paradise Turns 5!

Pegging Paradise Turns 5!!!

Pegging Paradise Turns 5!!!

Five years ago today, I struggled with the exact right words for my very first blog post here at Pegging Paradise. After waiting so long to bring my passions and erotica out into the open, how could I possibly find the right words that could encompass my excitement, my trepidation, and my happiness?

I managed to find some words that seemed to work. They helped me express how excited I was to be offering my words to the world at last. They helped me express my happiness at finally allowing my erotic proclivities a free rein for the first time in my life. I kept my trepidation to myself, however. I wasn't really sure how my words and ideas would be received. I simply wanted to get my erotica out in the world. I knew that there were people who enjoyed pegging as much as I did. I was hoping to connect with them, get some appreciation for my erotica, probably write some more erotica, and go on with my life.

A lot more than that happened.

I dove into learning as much as I could about pegging. If I was going to be talking with people about it, I needed to know what the hell I was talking about. I studied up on the best toys and harnesses, the best lubes, and what was the most effective way to talk with your partner about pegging. Then I branched off into everything about the prostate, the physiology of the ass, and the psychology of role reversal . The proverbial rabbit hole, yes.  Before I knew it, I was down it and having the time of my life!

One of the more challenging aspects about pegging was the taboo edginess connected to it. In other areas of life, I observed that one of the best ways to find some ease with a touchy subject is to personalize it. While the concept of pegging might freak some people out, a personal story about why and how someone enjoys it breaks the ice because the concept gets personalized. So I told my stories. I let you into my life as much as I felt comfortable letting you in, changing the names to protect the (anything but) innocent. I let you wonder, sometimes, how much was fiction and how much was real. And I kept telling my stories.

Then an amazing thing happened. You started sharing your stories with me! A conversation began. That's when the magic happened. We learned from each other.

At this point, I feel confident in saying that a butt load of people (heh heh) have learned a lot about pegging from this website. But I have learned from you, too. You offered me different perspectives and personal details that were not a part of my experience. I learned to hold space for your sensitivities, preferences, and desires. Especially if they were unlike my own. I learned to not look at things so black and white (like gay/straight versus bisexual).

I learned how powerful it was to hold space for you. I began to encourage you, without judgment, to pursue your passions. I told you it was okay to enjoy ass play and if anyone told you different, you had my permission to tell them to fuck off. I talked about men's asses and fucking them in a matter-of-fact manner, easing your fears and concerns. I gave you all the information you needed to play safe and enjoy yourselves.

In fact, I made sure you knew that whatever you really loved to do sexually, whether it was cross-dressing, BDSM, big toys, panties, bisexuality, fisting or threesomes (and that's just a partial list), it was all okay. I mean, who the hell was I to give you permission, right? But one thing I saw was that people seemed to derive so much comfort from simply being encouraged to be exactly who they were sexually. Just an expression of acceptance and encouragement went so very far. You were all perfectly awesome people simply experiencing your sexuality the way you enjoyed the most, Huzzah for you! I celebrated you all.

The irony was not lost on me. I was the woman who waited three decades to embrace her sexuality. And there I was encouraging you all not to follow my example, to do it now.

Around then was when I started getting those letters that warm my heart to this day. You saved our marriage...   My husband and I have never been  happier...  We've never had sex this good...  Your website helped us navigate a new sexual adventure... You helped my wife understand my desires... So many letters! So much intimacy, sexiness and erotic satisfaction. So much happiness!

I had no idea 5 years ago that my decision to pursue my erotic proclivities with abandon would end up helping so many people. That still amazes me. And thrills me. To say I am ecstatic would be an understatement. So that's my mission now; to help people find more erotic pleasure in their lives. It's a great job.

So hey everybody, thanks for reading my stuff. Thanks for listening to my podcasts. Thanks for asking me all those questions, the easy ones as well as the hard ones. Thanks for sharing your stories.

You are all a part of Pegging Paradise.

Happy Birthday, everyone. We are 5!!

Lots of Love,

Ruby

 

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2 comments

  1. Thank you for all the advice and great views on everything sexual.

    1. You are so very welcome!!

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