Many years ago I was on a women's getaway trip in Cambria, California. Back then there was a place called Seekers Glass Gallery that I visited every time I was there. For me, the experience of being in that shop was like visual chocolate mousse. The joy I felt when gazing at their creations sticks in my memory. And this was way before Chihuly was big. Even if I could have afforded some of the sculptures, mine is not a life that has much space for big, expensive, and fragile objects.
Now that's not to say that art has no space in my life. It totally does. In fact I'm a passionate lover of bold colors and unusual furnishings. Most people's houses are boring to me, with all the beiges and whites and rooms that look like they came straight out of a catalogue. Give me jewel tones and deep, rich colors any day of the week. Throw in a few unusual objects and I feel right at home.
So during this visit to the gallery, I saw a small rectangular dish with a metallic prism effect in colors of purple and blue. It looked perfect for a butter dish, and was $30. I remarked upon it to my friend. She urged me to buy it. I was a single mom with a young child and a dog, living frugally. While I could afford it, that dish didn't seem to fit in my life. I could just see it getting broken before long, and said as much to my friend. And I have never forgotten her response.
"Maybe the amount of joy this dish brings you having it in your life every day before it breaks is worth it, even if it doesn't last very long."
I bought the dish. And I loved that dish every time I saw it, and each time I used it. It did break before long, but I don't recall how. What I do remember is how much pleasure it brought me while I had it. My friend was right.
Years later, I was searching antique and thrift stores for a spoon rest to sit on my stove; a decidedly utilitarian item. My daughter, now an adult, was with me. We walked into one store and I saw a saucer probably meant for a teacup with a stunning pattern on it of tiger lilies against a black background. I exclaimed how lovely it was, and then continued my search for a spoon rest. I did find one that was rather boring, but kept looking at the saucer. This time it was my daughter that offered her thoughts.
"So just get the saucer and use it as a spoon rest. No one is going to tell you can't use it that way simply because it's not a spoon rest. If you love it, get it!"
I did get it, evidenced by the photo above. I paid $12, as I recall. And it brings me joy every time I lovingly wash it and replace it on the stove. The china pattern is Royal Albert Prairie Lily, and it satisfies my love of bold colors wonderfully.
Sometimes it's the small things that can boost your daily joy factor. It's having that one piece of art that brings you joy every time you see it. And art can be found in butter dishes and spoon rests, my friends. Indeed, art can be found in so many places. We, as subjective beholders, get to choose where we find our art and our joy.
I'm glad I have that saucer, and many other items that surround me which bring me joy. I hope that you have art, music, books, hobbies or friends that do the same for you. Find what brings you joy, I urge you. Because joy is important right now, wherever you can find it. That is how we are going to get through the next 4 years. Practice self-care and find your joy. Do not feel guilty that you have joyful moments while the country devolves into chaos.
Social media-wise, I am now only on Bluesky: @rubyryder.bsky.social. I still have an account on tiktok, but don't use it much. Bluesky is where I get news from journalists, politicians and news sources I trust. These days most of it is really bad news. I can only doom scroll for so long before I know that I need balance. So I follow many extremely talented photographers there as well, and every time one of their photos pop up in my feed it's a timeline cleanser that helps me find balance.
If I'm really feeling overwhelmed, I go to my photographers only list and just look at that feed (because you can do that on Bluesky, unlike the other platforms that show you what they want you to see). We live on a planet with such astonishing beauty and these photographers are kind enough to bring us images from all over the world. I'm so grateful for the simple joy of seeing their photographs.
Here's my last word for this piece: Worrying doesn't change a damn thing, so if you can help it, don't spend your time or energy worrying. (I know, easier said than done.) Spend your time and energy actively fighting for what you believe in, whatever way works for you, and then make a point to balance it out and seek your joy. Fighting without rest is a recipe for burnout. This is the only way to get through this with our sanity intact. Hang in there. This, too, shall pass.
(By the way, sex toys can certainly bring you joy and some can definitely be considered works of art! Please support my work by shopping at my affiliates.)
