Pegging is a sexual activity that is rife with myths, misconceptions and assumptions. Because of all the inaccurate information, approaching your partner about pegging can feel like an impossible task. What if they question your sexual orientation? What if they misunderstand your reasons for wanting to explore this new sexual territory?
First step - you will definitely need to have a conversation. There is no magic wand to instantly make your partner eager to explore pegging without talking about it. Consequently, communicating about your desires is essential, and the logical first step.
When approaching your partner about pegging, try to let go of any shame or embarrassment you may feel. Be excited about the topic, sincere in your approach, and calm. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for wanting to explore this! In addition, you will never know if they are interested unless you ask them.
After introducing the subject, you need to talk about what kind of pegging you envision. This will help to ensure sure you are on the same page, or are willing to compromise if you aren't. This is important because pegging can be done a lot of different ways.)
Recordings to Help You!
Some couples are not very comfortable talking about sexy stuff. Because of that discomfort, most couples don't talk about sex until they are in crisis. (If this is true for you, I encourage you to work on that aspect of your relationship. The ability to talk about sex openly and easily with your partner is an important component to a happy relationship. )
I have created 2 podcasts to guide you with this conversation about pegging.
- For the Givers - If you want your partner to peg you, this one is for you.
- For the Receivers - If you want to peg your partner, this one is for you.
Okay, this next part is quite important! Listen to the one that applies to your situation first, by yourself. This way you will know what to expect. More importantly, only you can decide if it is the right thing for your particular situation and your partner.
At this point, if you decide the recording is suitable, I strongly urge you to listen to it together. That way you can pause the podcast when questions come up. The recording will take you through the typical misconceptions and fears. Some of these topics will require a little conversation to see if you are on the same page, or different pages.
In this way, the recording will ensure that your partner's concerns are brought up, so that you can talk about each one. In this manner, they will gain accurate information with which to make their decision. (For example - a giver might wonder whether the receiver wants to dress up like a woman while getting pegged.) As a result, there will be less surprises further down the road. Your partner can get the whole picture of what they are saying yes to.
A Gift of Intimacy
Lastly, throughout these recordings I emphasize the relationship. You are allowing your partner to know you on a deeper level by sharing your desires with them. Above all, approaching your partner about pegging is a courageous gift of intimacy! Whatever your partner decides regarding the pegging, I encourage them to be grateful for your gift, and the courage it took for you to share it.
Good luck to you!