Mo’ Better?

Is it time to buy a bigger dildo for your strap-on?

Assuming you went out and bought a reasonably sized dildo for your first strap-on  harness (all the better to break him in gently), when is it time to graduate to a larger size?

Communication is always best - just ask your guy! But if he is a little shy about loving the fact that you are fucking his ass...he might not want to come right out and say, "Gee honey, I think I'd really like a bigger dildo for you to peg me with...can you pick one up on the way home?" He may be having a hard time getting used to the fact he likes to be pegged at all...except when you are actually stroking in and out of him and he is moaning (and dripping) with pleasure. So probably best not to mention the phrase "size queen" because he might still be stuck in the I'm Not Gay space...in which case the word "queen" may set him off. We must tread carefully in this Pegging Paradise, male egos must be considered. Besides, if you freak him out or piss him off, who are you going to peg then?

Another way to determine if it is time for a larger model is to pay close attention to how he receives your pegging. Is he asking you to go harder? Is he pushing back to meet your thrusts? Is he opening up for your fingers and strap-on more quickly, requiring less warm-up? If the answer to these questions is yes, chances are good he can accommodate and would enjoy a larger dildo.  A more ample toy will give him more sensation on his prostate, and few men don't like that. There is also something very hot and naughty about sliding a bigger dildo into your man's ass, for you both. A sort of pushing his limits to see what pleasure it will bring. It can be quite a sight...and the moans alone are worth it! *fans self*

So...in purchasing the "next size up", remember it is an individual process. Do this with thought and consideration.

Pay Attention to the Measurements!

When you are pegging your guy, can he take the full length of the dildo easily? Does he ask for you to go harder? If the answer is yes, you could probably increase the length of the dildo about 1/2". But remember if that hard thrusting feels good to him (or you) be careful about adding too much length at once because it may be too long for him to take comfortably.  If it was me - I wouldn't increase the length more than an inch, max. But that's because I do like to be able to sink to the hilt.  There are dildos in just about every size and shape these days, so pay attention to the dimensions. If you want short and fat, long and thin or long and fat - they have them all.

When judging the thickness of your new toy, again - check those measurements. Diameter means how wide the dildo is from one side to another - usually measured at the widest part. Circumference is the measurement around the outside of the dildo, like you were wrapping a tape measure around it. I don't like to go up more that 1/2" diameter at once for the comfort of your peggee. For example, the Vixen Mistress is 6 inches long, 1 and 3/16 inches in diameter. Good beginner size. (And it comes in silver glitter - how can you resist that?)  The Vixen Champlette Vibe is 6 inches long, 1 and 5/8 inches in diameter. If you replace your Mistress with the Champlette, you will be gaining 7/16 of an inch in diameter; just under a half inch. Your length will remain the same.

All this advice is for men who are new to pegging. If you have the luck to find yourself with an experienced peggee, just ask him about his favorite size. He might even bring his own equipment! Gotta love that.

A Word About Shape and Material

I wouldn't recommend ridges or groves or a lot of texture. Most men report that a smooth surfaced dildo is more than enough to give them adequate stimulation. Ridges and bumps can not only be hard to clean, but overstimulating for beginners. Anal tissue is delicate. Silicone is optimum for long sessions, though Vixen's new "Vix Skin" is something I have yet to try - but getting rave reviews. Vix Skin is a patented process combining 100% premium grade Silicone with molecules of silicone lubricant  to create a very realistic texture and greater elasticity. It's a bit pricey, but people love it. Please be sure you do NOT buy a "jelly" dildo. Jelly dildos are cheap, mostly because they are not safe to put in your body. Can you say toxic? Glass and metal can be novel but normally not used for strap-on play and too rigid for most guys for extended sessions. Silicone is easy to clean (STI safe) and pliable, has some give to it, you can't go wrong if you stick with silicone.

So go forth, armed with information and get thee a larger dildo!

Once purchased, the only question is...are you going to tell him? Or maybe blindfold him and let it be a surprise...

As always, Happy Pegging.

Ruby Ryder