I sit here on a cool morning, quietness surrounds me. The flow of words is clear in my head.
An entire month of self-pleasuring. Mmmmm.
Quite a delicious celebration for Masturbation Month 2012, if I do say so myself.
So how do I feel after getting off every day for 31 days? Pretty damn good, I must say. I feel inspired. I feel sexy. I have creative ideas for stories and for my website in general.
I walk around in the world seeing other people with a sexual overlay...like I am viewing them through a piece of tinted cellophane that reveals passion. I make up stories about the people I see. What are their sex lives like?
Some stories are surprising. You might never think that sharp-dressed man buying the bottle of designer water at the convenience store has a wild sex life. You might have suspected if you saw the way his fingers trailed over the bottles before choosing one, the way he tapped his foot to the canned music playing on the tinny speakers or the way his tongue came out and licked his lips just for a moment there. Yeah. His bed has some fun happening in it.
Other stories are sad. Those people move with a trance-like lethargy that betrays them. In bed their goal is to get there as quickly as they can because that's all they have the energy for. Quick, furtive and ultimately unsatisfying; they never go to the deeper layers of sexual pleasure. The quick, immediate gratification orgasm that satisfies for a short time but soon leaves them craving an undefinable...more. Such a disconnect.
I am walking around in the world so very aware and welcoming of my sexuality after 31 straight days of self-pleasuring. As a result I can feel when people are really sexually disconnected. And so many are. I have had times like that in my life...and I never want to go back to that way of existing again. I wouldn't call it living, it is just existing.
Where is that Magic Wand? (not the Hitachi) The one I would offer to all of you readers and your partners and friends. One touch and your passionate side blossoms and thrives. You leave judgment and fear behind, you explore sensations and emotions...deciding for yourself what your favorite ones are, not listening to any of the "shoulds". In this way...you discover what resides in the dark, uncharted corners of your sexuality.
Don't wait for the wand. Do it.