I was listening to a Dan Savage podcast once when a caller asked how she could stop fantasizing about her ex when she masturbated. The relationship had ended mutually and amicably; a long distance incompatibility, yet she still found him in her mind when looking for hot fapping fantasies. Dan reassured her that there was absolutely nothing wrong with rubbing one out to thoughts of her ex. He said even happily married to Terry, that he still has what he calls his "Solodex" - a Rolodex of fantasies that happened with other guys that he pulls out to use when he's by himself, traveling. The idea that you are never supposed to fantasize about anyone else when you are in a relationship or if the relationship ends you are never supposed to fantasize about the ex is ridiculous. Some memories are too hot to forget.
In that vein, I was remembering a long time ago when an ex and I were driving back along the coast highway from a late night of dancing. He pulled off the freeway and took a road to a deserted cliff-top picnic area that had picnic tables with shade structures over them. Without a word he took me to one of the concrete pillars, slipped the belt from his jeans and used it to secure my wrists to the pillar. Then he moved in back of me, lifted my skirt, pushed my panties aside and fucked me right there.
Okay - that was pretty hot, but I'm really not submissive. So in my mind last night I switched it up and he was the one getting fucked, tied to the pillar.