Apr 04 2012

Bear Down

That is the one hint most often overlooked when I have seen advice for newcomers to pegging, and it can make a world of difference in  your initial experience.

Your anal sphincters are built to open up and let things out, but not to open up and let things in. So the first few times you are penetrated with fingers, toys or a dildo, you must learn the trick of consciously opening up that sphincter.

How do you do that? By acting like you are trying to have a bowel movement. Exactly like that. You bear down and kind of push out. This allows your anal sphincter to open and then allows penetration.

I have had some interesting questions asked about this technique:

Won't I take a shit if I do that?

No - not if you have already emptied your bowels (which anyone getting ready to receive anal sex should do), there is nothing in there. Shit does not magically appear just because you bear down.

Won't I squeeze the dildo out?

No - on the contrary, it will help the dildo/toy/fingers go in.

Are you sure I won't take a shit?

Positive. Just make sure you empty your bowels before play.

So that's your hint for the day, ladies and gentlemen.

Bear Down!

Then write and tell us how it went.... 🙂


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  1. Nice advice Ruby. Been lucky enough to have read this sort of advice years back on the Internet, and been enjoy my fingers from time to time.

    Hmm, you’ve got me wanting it this weekend…honestly, was planning on it anyway Ruby 😉

  2. I’m kinda planning on it this weekend, too… 😉
    Have fun!

  3. Oh I will Ruby…while hooked on the 6″ vibe now, I’m looking at purchasing the Naughty Boy prostate massager. It vibrates on the perineum as well 🙂 A bonus will be if its hands free once its in, hope so. It gets good reviews, and has gotten men leaking semen in 10 minutes or so. Gotten to that stage only 2-3 times so far and by accident. Its it best feeling, kind of like a soft prolonged warm orgasm.

    Hope you enjoy yourself Ruby, whether with the lucky guy or by yourself 😉

  4. that is the way i’ve always done it…works so well

    1. Glad to hear my advice is valid! Thanks Joe.

  5. Nice plug for the Naughty Boy prostate massager – sadly it doesn’t work that way. Not a bad piece of kit (though too long for me). But there’s NO WAY it’s going to stay in hands free. It needs one hand permanently holding it there or else it just shoots out. And the vibration is just … annoying. Save your money. Really.

  6. skipper – thanks for the heads up. The reviews do seem to indicate it is not easy to use as a solo toy and doesn’t stay in. Did you ever buy one, SweetNFet?

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