Anal Sex Rant

Occasionally women will post on Reddit that they had anal sex for the first time, he went right in, no lube no prep, no problem.

One recent post like this:

I [19F] just had anal sex for the first time with literally no preparation. It was fine. Am I weird?

Okay, I am all for anomalies. But as she divulges more information we find that she was really really wet vaginally and they used that for lube plus (porn-like) spit, and she had experimented with anal penetration herself before with small toys. Glad it worked out well for them both.

What frustrates me to no end, however, are some of the comments on these threads. They seem to imply the goal here is to have anal sex the way it's done in porn.

You are better than most if that was all it took and you enjoyed it.

Not better, different. In fact so different you are unlike most people - men and women.

Not weird at all. In fact, I did some research on the topic. The scientific name for your condition is "keeper" or alternatively, "wife material".

Ouch -  I find this one offensive. Kind of like a woman saying, "He has a huge dick and can go all night? Sounds like marriage material to me!" Life is not porn, people!

You're fine. I also don't require all the bells and whistles.

Bells and whistles? Preparation and lube should never be looked at as a bothersome extra. They are necessities to not only ensure a pleasurable experience but a safe experience for the receiver of the anal sex.

Anal sex in porn is completely unrealistic.

Can you get to the point where anal sex can be done relatively quickly with little warmup? Sure you can. But no lube, in my opinion, is just plain stupid. Or sadistic/masochistic. And for the record, though I am indeed a bit of a sadist, it is the outside of the ass that I like to punish - never the inside.

So here I am in a ranty mood about all this and what do I find? A group on FetLife called "Anal Sex Without Lube". Pretty much mostly (but not all) male dominants and female submissives. I mean if that's what you like is to tear your ass up I suppose that's certainly your right to engage in that, be you the destroyer or the destroyed. I guess I just object to how there is a spillover from groups like this and from the unrealistic porn that creates this attitude amongst far too many men that anal sex should be able to be done the porn way.

To the destroyers I say, let me shove an un-lubricated dildo with a little spit on it up your ass and then we'll talk.