May 15 2014

I’m Learning

OKCupid message.

Sent from a handsome, smiling man in a military uniform close to my age. Exploration of his profile showed a conservative guy, self-confessed old-fashioned, who told me he is "looking to explore and broaden my traditional notions of the bedroom". Here was my reply.

You are catching me at an interesting time, so you are going to get an earful. You might like it. You might not.

I have a weakness for military men, truth be told. I seem to attract them. Perhaps because my personality is strong enough to actually hold space for a masculine man to let go of all that control and just receive. I can do that.

Along with the weakness I have for military men, I have a skill with them.

(Incoming generalizations)
You guys have existed in a little box, terribly constrained, for way too long...and you need out. Most of you have cut off your emotions to the extent that you don't allow yourselves to feel deeply. You need to re-learn how to feel things, try new experiences outside the box, find out what you really love and who you really are instead of who you have been expected to be for so many years.

I actually excel at that. I can facilitate that if the chemistry is good between us, and if you are brave and willing enough. Think part counselor and part sexual exploration partner/coach .

But here's my dilemma.

This is my pattern - I choose the wounded and heal them. Doesn't get me any closer to my forever man and it has become a skill that I actually should be marketing instead of giving my all and healing soldier after soldier. Love you guys, but I'm not interested in a soldier as a life partner.

So the question becomes, what's in it for me? Because altruism doesn't pay the bills.

You did not approach me as a potential partner - you approached me as a catalyst. I guess I have finally decided that I don't do this just for the thrill of healing someone or helping someone explore anymore. Or just for the thrill of being able to control an alpha.

Your move.

All the best,
Ruby

 

Bets on whether I will hear from him? I'm betting no.

Thanks to Sabrina Morgan for this: "It's volunteer work and a lot of us find it hard not to do it in our personal lives. If they're not there yet, they're probably someone who should be a client, not a play partner."

 

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