Dan Savage

This is a part of Dan's introduction to his podcast this week (#278)

He was talking about conservative opposition to abortion, homosexuality and contraception.

Abortion, contraception, homosexuality, it is all about - all 3 issues - are about the non-baby-making sex that you're not supposed to be having. They don't want to bring the abortion rate down. They want to make sure that people who have abortions are punished for the having of sex without intending to have a baby by only being able to get the most dangerous and perhaps lethal abortion possible. They want abortions to be less rare than they are now, less rare than they are thanks to Planned Parenthood but much more dangerous because they think those bitches who are having sex and don't want to have babies should be punished. And people who want to use birth control? They want to make sure that that is as difficult as possible because people who want to have sex without having babies should be punished. They want to throw obstacles in their way. People who are gay...they know just as they know that even in a world where abortion is illegal like in Romania and Nicaragua people are still gonna have abortions, they know people are still going to be gay. But they want to make sure that we are punished. They want us to suffer. They want us stigmatized and discriminated against.

The obsession isn't babies, despite what you may have seen on billboards on highways in red states. The obsession is sex. They are terrified of their own genitals and more so of your genitals. They're terrified of their desires and they wake up every day acutely aware that they could spin out of control sexually at any moment. They are barely hanging on. Because that's how we're wired, all of us. They can barely control themselves and they think that maybe if they assert control over you they'll have an easier time controlling themselves. They want your choices to be as limited as they have made their own. And if you make different choices? Around birth control, around being with the people who you're actually attracted to if you're gay or lesbian or bi they want to see you punished. Because if you're allowed to make different choices, to have non-procreative sex, to use birth control, to be gay if you're gay, it really does make a mockery of the limitations they've placed on themselves.

If you can do all those things and be happy, healthy, a contributing member of society and not miserable...they die a little inside. They get hurt. They get angry because they've told themselves that this is how sex is supposed to work. This is the way the world is supposed to work. And there you are living your life proving every day...that it ain't the way it works. That that's not what sex is for. That you can live the life you're living and live it successfully and you know what that does? That rubs their pitifully unfulfilling fear-warped sex lives back in their own faces and they hate you for that! They can't forgive you for that! Hence the desire to control you, persecute you, punish you...because you're everything they want to be, everything they're wired to be...and nothing they're allowing themselves to be.



4 Responses

  1. Ruby;

    Thanks for posting this.

    You know what’s really sad and disturbing about the “Culture War” over sexual freedoms? The hypocrisy of the so-called social conservatives Dan Savage is flogging. You can’t go a month without seeing some fundamentalist preacher or conservative politician caught with his pants down. Those guys are not holding it together very well, despite their best efforts. Next: Rick Santorum. I can’t wait to read about his little secret.



  2. Hey Dave – No – those guys are definitely not holding it together very well at all. Seems to me we see the most unusual (read immoral or hypocritical) behavior from the people who are trying to live within the most narrow sexual rules. Imagine that!

    I still can’t believe Santorum is against contraception! Dan Savage said the conservatives would eventually come for the contraception…lol.

  3. As the son of a protestant minister, I love– L-O-V-E this. All of it. For a long time, I have marveled at the propensity for the “rule keepers,” the watch-dogs and the finger-waggers to eventually be exposed for taking part in the same activities/behavior they have been condemning. And they are ALWAYS exposed at some point.

    1. @KPP – I feel the same – there was something quite profound about how Dan expressed this. I heard so much truth in it that I just had to transcribe what he said and post it here. Savage says that the men who are the most vociferously condemning of gays are always gay – and their lovers or paid escorts have a responsibility to out them for the benefit of the entire gay community. There’s a long list of them at this point.

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