Random thoughts from dating land about the qualities I enjoy in a partner...
Confidence. Here's the difference between true confidence and cockiness. Confidence is quieter and calmly self-assured. Cockiness is more extroverted and has a show-off quality to it. Men who are confident, whether it's ordering dinner or sliding their fingers into my pussy...hot.
Kindness. You know - kids and animals and all that. Here are some other examples...having patience with the server who's having a tough night...giving a little kid who's being yelled at for being a kid a sly smile and a nod of reassurance...telling the checker in the market that she has a a beautiful smile...taking care of me when I'm sick. Those kinds of things.
Sensuality. There is a specific kind of touch I crave that connects with my skin and caresses it in just the right way so it feels like my skin and the touch go together like cream and coffee. Same story with his kiss...soft lips meeting mine in a dance where no one leads, we both just explore. (Not like he's attacking my mouth with his tongue.)
Well dressed. He puts clothes on with thought for style as well as comfort and is well groomed. Metrosexual? Perhaps. I'm a sucker for a man in a suit. But khakis and a dress shirt rolled up at the sleeves can get me going, too. And I will never look askance at a nice-fitting pair of jeans.
PDAs. Public displays of affection have a soft spot in my heart and make me wet. I don't know why. There is something so damn exciting about being pushed gently up against a wall in a public place and necking for a while, not caring who comes by. The sexy looks, the soft, lingering kisses and the absent-minded caresses make me feel so desired. And when everyone else around you is wishing they were you, you're doing something right.
Erections! When I kiss a man and he gets hard against me - I love that. To know that I can turn him on, that he is excited by me and gets erect - that alone has aphrodisiac qualities for me. I want to drag him home and fuck him. Or into the bedroom. Or on the dining room table. Wherever! Yeah.
Intelligence. The importance of intellectual foreplay can be underestimated. Having an in-depth conversation and meeting of the minds is a lovely prelude to a meeting of bodies, in my opinion. I suppose I am a sapiosexual to a certain extent. Smart guys rock.
Communication. Right on the heels of intelligence is communication. I love a man who treats communication the way I like to kiss - a back and forth dance with times of speaking and times of true listening. Not a holding court (see cockiness). How else are two people going to get to know each other? Being interesting is good. Being interested as well is even better.
More musings from dating land to come next week!